Fighting phobia formation by blocking scary memories from forming

This past weekend, I came across this, an article on the Science website about NYU researchers' efforts to extinguish fearful aspects of memories during the "reconsolidation" phase of the memory-recall process. Here's how it worked:

The scientists started by creating a scary memory of a blue square. They flashed blue or yellow squares on a computer screen and gave subjects a slight shock on the wrist when only the blue square appeared. After this training session, just flashing the blue square without a shock put people on edge, which the researchers measured by recording tiny currents that pass through their skin. One day later, the scientists performed extinction training by flashing the blue square repeatedly without any shocks. To trigger reconsolidation, one-third of the subjects got a reminder--a quick flash of the blue square--10 minutes before extinction training. (Reconsolidation normally starts about 3 minutes after a memory gets recalled.) Another third received a reminder 6 hours beforehand--which meant that the extinction training began well past the time when reconsolidation ended--and the final third weren't reminded at all.

When the scientists tested the subjects' response to the blue square a day later, those who received the 10-minute reminder showed no fear, while the other two groups were still freaked out by the shape. Even 1 year later, those subjects who underwent extinction training during reconsolidation still showed no response to the blue squares, while their counterparts retained the fear memory, the scientists report online today in Nature. "Because extinction training happened during [reconsolidation], we think that ... the nature of the memory changed," Phelps says.

Imagine how helpful it would be if you could make it so that a location where you experienced a panic attack does not make you fearful or want to avoid it moving forward. Heck, my career would probably be completely different (and probably more lucrative) if I hadn't had to endure periods of being unable to commute by train or highway. The potential benefits of this research in fighting agoraphobia are exciting.

Guest Post The Good Enough Parent How Children from Abusive Families Sometimes Do Not Seem To See Their Own Abusiveness

Today's guest post is by Sara Dawkins. This is the second post in which a writer recounts his or her own experience in a family with a problematic history. She addresses the confusion a child can feel when parents who have themselves been abused by their own parents do unto others what had been done to them. ~ D.A.

This is a topic that is very close to my heart so it is difficult for me to write about. Let me start with something that is a little easier. First of all, I will talk about my partner. His father, to be precise. My partner’s father was abused as a child. As was his father. I am sure the cycle continued for many generations. However what got me to really recognize this idea in my own life was something my partner said to me the other day:

“My father is proud of the fact that he is a better father than his father was, but that’s not very hard to do.”

Wow. He was so right. Just because the father came from an abusive home, that did not mean that his own abusive behavior was better in some way. As a matter of fact, my partner’s father can’t even see how abusive he is, as a father and as a spouse.

That brought me around to thinking about my own family. Both my mother and grandmother were from abusive homes, as was my father.

My father was practically abandoned for most of his life and when his parents were around they were verbally and physically fighting with one another. Although he was not hurting in material things, he did not get any instruction about how to behave, and was left to his own devices. He turned into a very selfish individual. Instead of trying to avoid repeating his history of abuse with his children he simply gave up. He stayed home for much of my young life, yes, but withdrew to his bedroom as soon as he got home and only left it to go to work. He did not interact much with my brother and I;  when he did it was only the minimum required so that he could feel as if he had “done his duty.” 

Eventually the stress of even that much involvement got to be too much for him and he left. He never did seem to see that he was falling into the same cycle of abuse that he had suffered through. After all, he could tell himself, he didn’t leave… for a while.

Likewise, my grandmother came from a difficult home. Her father was an alcoholic and the family lived in basements and with relatives because he would drink away his paycheck or simply not go to work at all. From this lifestyle my grandmother learned to work hard and try to keep everything as perfect as possible so that she, hopefully, would not have him get angry at him when he got home. 

She later married a man who was much like her father, and as her children grew up under his verbally and physically abusive hand, she cleaned and kept everyone looking good. To this day she defends her father and is in denial about the abuse she lived through. By keeping everything whitewashed in her mind, she was simply repeating the process of enabling abusers and was keeping the process going.

Needless to say my mother grew up feeling abandoned by her mother and abused by her father. Shockingly, she chose to fight the trend. Although she could not fight off the effects completely, she did not give into the same habits that had plagued the generations before her. Don’t get me wrong. She still had many issues. She was prone to rage and verbal abuse. However, she decided that her children were not going to suffer like she had. 

She was determined to break the cycle. I have to admit, she works really hard to do so. She is not perfect by any means, but when she does fall into those bad habits she always makes sure to apologize for them and tell us what she should have done instead. By thusly changing the pattern, she has been successful at breaking most of the bad habits that plagued our family. Although we are not completely unaffected, my brother and I are moderately well adjusted. I believe that the most important thing she taught us is to be mindful of our actions.

Sometimes people that have been abused do not seem to see the abuse that carries on in their lives. They have many of those same habits and ways of thinking. Sometimes they just assume that they are better parents because they do not do exactlythe same thing or do not do everythingtheir parents did. Being a ‘better’ parent does not make you a good parent or even a non-abusive one.

It really hurts me to see that my uncles are not as cognizant of this as my mother is. They have many of the same abusive behaviors in their homes and yet they act as if they can’t understand why their children are acting out, being rebellious, running away, or just giving up. They don’t see that they are just continuing a cycle of abuse.

I know how difficult it is to break habits that you have grown up with and I am thankful that my mother was able to give me some understanding and insight into her mind. This has helped me to break the cycle within my own relationships and live a healthier, more balanced life.

Author Bio

Sara is an active nanny as well as an active freelance writer. She is a frequent contributor of http://www.nannypro.com/.  Learn more about her at http://www.nannypro.com/blog/sara-dawkins/.

Should You Send That Query What We Can Learn From The Marshmallow Test

I know many of you are writers who plan to query or are querying, so this one is for you. However, today's topic applies to just about every area of our lives, so ... I guess this is actually for everyone, but we'll use the road to publication as an example.

Let's say you write a novel. You think it's a good novel. You read over it a few times, and you're amazed this riveting combination of drama and suspense and romance and intrigue could have flown from your fingers. Your mom reads it, and she agrees! She thinks you're the next ________________(insert the name her favorite published author here). Your heart beats faster. Your thoughts whirl with possibilities. You could really do this--you could share your work with the world and make it as a writer. With dreams of making the NYT Best Seller List dancing in your head, you do a little research on how to get published.

What you decide to do next and the implications of that decision can be nicely summed up with the following video.

Let me set this up for you.

You = Kid

Experiment = Query Process

Marshmallow = YOU TELL ME AFTER WATCHING THIS:

On Wednesday, I'll talk more about this experiment, what it tells us about impulse control, and what it could mean for querying writers (and everyone else).

Please stop by Laura's blog to check out her ever-intriguing Mental Health Monday post, and go to Lydia's blog to read her always-awesome Medical Monday post.

Now tell me--what does the marshmallow represent?

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Recovery from anxiety I recovered from panic attacks and panic disorder

Hi Guys,

I thought about this day a lot over the years and I can finally tell you Ive recovered from anxiety.
Im writing on here because I know alot of people wont have followed me to my new blog and thats ok!
I want you to know that being anxiety free is possible, and Id know because that is me today.

Over the years I read some truly harrowing stories online of people who had suffered with anxiety for 20+ years, and worried Id be one of them. Today I can safely say that is not the case.

How did I get here?

Knowledge is Power

I read a few fantastic books: Anxious by Joseph LeDoux,  'Rewire Your Anxious Brain: How to Use the Neuroscience of Fear to End Anxiety, Panic, and Worry' by Catherine Pittman and 'The Power of Now' by Eckhart Tolle and 'At Last a Life' by Paul David (A sufferer of anxiety of 10 years)

Im not endorsing anyone, Im just telling you that they were useful and I'll attempt to explain why.
Anxiety is caused by stress. You are not going mental or do you have any physical illness that is threatening your life. Chances are you've been down these routes and professionals have told you the same thing. Joseph LeDoux and Catherine Pittman describe the processes in the brain that underpin, cause and add to anxiety. In laymans terms you either worry (which causes a thoughts-feeling-behaviour cycle usually "Oh no the boss wants to speak to me" - feels dread and anxiety - panic attack) or you are exposed to some anxiety provoking situation that has been etched into your mind by emotional memory and therefore everytime you encounter it you panic so you start to avoid it.

To beat this: stop worrying. Yes that is just it. Worry never changes anything, it just makes you worse. You may have positive beliefs that underpin worry "It helps me plan, it helps me cope" Do you have some? Write them down - they are keeping you unhappy.

A few months ago my dog was attacked by another dog. The other dog had latched onto my dogs face, and although im a massive animal lover there was no way to free my dog without physically kicking the other off. Eventually I had to put my hand inside the other dogs mouth so it would bite me rather than my dog. This was reckless but I felt like my dogs life was in danger so..what the hell. It broke my finger, but my dog escaped relatively injury free. I coped fine without having to plan for this.

You do not need to worry about anything, because you have the skills and the inbuilt amygdala reflexes to cope with whatever comes your way.

If you step out into the road and a car comes along, your body automatically jumps back. You do not need to think, and if you did the chances are you would have been hit by a car by the time you'd thought about what you had to do.

Trust your body, it is the product of thousands of years of survival. It doesnt need any interference from your mind in a scary situation, the mind just makes it worse.

Accept you'll feel anxious for a little while Your 'illness' is the fact you are trying to supress an emotion that cannot ever be removed from your experience. Do you spend hours trying to get rid of happiness? Is that even possible? No.

"But anxiety is awful" I hear you say. Yes it is, but it will pass. The fact you are labelling it and paying attention to it is what is making it worse. You've been so over stressed worrying about your panic attacks, or worrying about worrying that it will take time to subside. You've formed a habit like smoking, that will niggle at you for a time. You DO NOT have to do anything to make it go away, just go about your life and it will die down.

When I read this in Paul David's book I was dismayed. All of the google searches, books, forums Id been on and the answer was do nothing?

It really is.

Id literally carved a life out of finding an answer to anxiety, and the answer was leave it alone.

Quit the forums, stop diagnosing yourself with other mental or physical illnesses and stop avoiding your life.

The 6 hour rule This is a rule Id discovered when reading Joseph LeDouxs work and will provide you with some scientific reassurance that anxiety will die down if you expose yourself to anxiety provoking situations. After conditiong, rats would exhibit a fear response at the sound of a tone (they'd be electricuted every time theyd heard the sound previously) The rats were then in the situation as you or previously me. The tone played - they became scared e.g You go into a supermarket - you become frightened. To counteract this the rats were played a tone without an electric shock, and learnt that nothing bad would happen. This is extinction/exposure.

HOWEVER

Sometimes a little while later when the rats were played the tone, they could again become scared. This is because the brain needs the rat to survive and will 'protect' it by creating fear in a situation it has previously been injured/frightened, even though it had also learnt there was nothing to be frightened of. The same can apply to human beings. It would rather be safe than sorry.

This happened to me. I went through CBT, was 'cured' could travel everywhere and then when I encountered my ex partner again, the anxiety returned. I lost faith in exposure.

LeDoux pulled something out of his sleeve, by accident. Sometimes the scared rats, would be put through exposure twice. This means they'd hear the tone and not be electricuted, then hear the tone and not be electricuted again. If this was done within a 6 hour period, the anxiety about the tone never returned. 

Apply this to your own gradual exposure. Go to the supermarket - your anxiety will go up, then go down when you stay in the situation. Return to the supermarket within 6 hours and do the same thing again. fear - gone  

You are not a rat - and this is a bonus. 

LeDouxs research is amazing but he fails to realise that we are not rats. Even if we are conditioned to fear something, we go through exposure that shows us nothing will happen and THEN still feel fear sometimes, we still have conscious choice.

We can choose to stay in the situation and put our faith in the fact that yes it is scary, but I also have an experience where nothing happened too.

Intrusive thoughts: 

These were single handedly the worst symtom I experienced. At the height of my anxiety Id think awful things like "What if I accidentally hurt someone when I panic?" They were very distressing. Dr Seif has some fantastic resources on them. Understand that you are not your thoughts. Everyone has weird thoughts, but people with anxiety just dont pay attention to them and thats exactly the approach you should take. The 'Power of Now' showed me that I am not my mind. It is the product of the experiences, people and life I have had and I can observe it without taking it personally.

Understand you're not mental, strange or a bad person and you can safely ignore these thoughts.

Find the cause

The biggest thing that helped me to recover - realising I was the victim of domestic violence. When I wrote this blog (2011 onwards) I was living with my partner and never disclosed that he was abusing me physically and mentally. Its difficult to open your eyes to how awful someone is treating you; Id exaggerate how fantastic he was, any little thing he did would be the best thing in the world because I knew how badly things could be. Recently I realised that he had actually caused my anxiety problem in the beginning. This was the beginning of the end of my worry cycle. No more google searches, forums, book reading searching for this miraculous 'anxiety secret' - I had it, and it was him. Realising he had caused me stress and emotional turmoil took the mystery and unknown out of it. It also took the shame away.

Maybe you have not been abused, maybe you took too much on at work, or had family problems, a divorce, bad effects from drug taking. Whatever it is, there will be something.

STRESS 

We've all heard eat right, excercise yaggedy yah - but actually do those things. If you're contending with low blood sugar you're bringing on an anxiety attack without even stepping out of the door. If you have a stressful job - start 5 a side football, running or something as small as walking the dog in the evening.

Its all well and good taking on your life again, but don't be your own down fall after all of this effort.

Start some relaxation. I don't care if you think you don't have time, or its 'weird'. You'd rather meditate to Youtube and have your life back than sit in and miss out on your life. The Honest Guys on Youtube are great.

If someone is causing you stress, cut them out of your life. Look at the impact it has had on you, you do not need this. If you can't cut them out, limit your time with them. If theyre a work colleague, try and change seats, see if you can change shifts or if they're bullying you now is the time to do something about it.

Do more of the things you enjoy - at first its hard facing your fears but if theres something good at the end of it you're more likely to go, and its fun. You're creating your new life, the way you want it to be. Nothing is off limits now.



To summarise:

• Anxiety is a normal emotion and it is OK that you feel it
• Leave it alone
• You are not in danger and it cannot make you go crazy
• Worrying is a pointless and destructive habit - stop it. Start with worry postponement if needed.
• Educate yourself on panic attacks - they are safe
• Stop using Google, anxiety forums  or obsessing over anxiety 
• Develop the attitude that you are going to get on with your life regardless of what you feel
• Read the 3 books mentioned above if needed
• Apply the 6 hour rule to anxiety provoking situations
• Manage stress: eat well, exercise & do fun things
• Get on with your life, you deserve it 
• Believe that people recover from anxiety, I did.

The strangest and most profound thing I have taken from this journey, is that I never had a problem at all. The problem was that I thought I had a problem. In reality I was trying to catch smoke.

Love, light and strength to all of you. This blog gets so many visitors and I really hope you all read this and apply it to your life. You do not have anxiety, you just think you do and you are capable of everything you want to achieve.

When you leave this post, I want you to leave your anxiety obsession here too. Don't waste anymore of your precious life on this subject,
                                                           life begins now.